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Help in editing
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Guest






PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 8:09 pm    Post subject: Help in editing Reply with quote

I am having a lot of trouble trying to edit this. Can someone help me out? This is what the script is suppose to say in english

A kid has a big test the next day but lost his textbook. He thinks of a plan and goes to his school and steals his teachers textbook. He uses a credit card covered with a handkerchief to open the door. While he is walking through the school, a teacher stops him because he is wearing a hat and asks him what he is doing at school so early. He starts to get very nervous and answers the teacher's questions but doesn’t get caught. As soon as the teacher finishes talking to him and turns around he dissapears.

The night before the test

Étudiant: Zut, J’ai oublié mon manuel et demain est un essai


Le prochain Jour

Étudiant: C’est temps. Je vais prêt

Parent: Quelle heure est-il?

Étudiant: Il est cinq heures. J’ai lu le roman.

Parent: Pourquoi t'es-tu réveillé si tôt?

Étudiant: J’ai étudie parce-que demain est essai

Parent: Qu'est-ce que tu as fait si tard hier soir

Étudiant: J'étais en train de chercher le cahier qui a disparu

Parent: J'allais t'emmener à l'école

Étudiant: non, merci

Étudiant: Je trouve pour mon handkerchief mais je ne decouvert pas.
Parent: Au fait, J’ai découvert ton mouchoir

Dans L’ecole

Étudiant: J’espois c’est venu travail..

Narrteur: Il a glisse le carte a couverture au mouchoir


Dans la classe

Étudiant : Excellente, mon idée est un succès. J’ai savu toujours, j’ai tres intelligent.

Étudiant : Oú est j’ai pu decouvert un livre.

Narrator : Il a trouvé dans le classe pour le dix minutes et finalement il a découvert un livre dans le bureau au le professeur du classe. Il a pris le livre rapidement et il a sorti dans le classe.

Étudiant : J’ai pensé, j’ai venu dans l’école parce que, il y a seulement un heure jusqu'à ma première classe à commencé et je ne suis pas retard.

thanks
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Guest






PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 8:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Also if u have any ideas to add o the script that would be great. Currently, all I need is to use some more passe compose and negitatives (negative answers) in it.
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Julien



Joined: 10 Feb 2005
Posts: 388
Location: Germany / France

PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 8:41 pm    Post subject: Re: Help in editing Reply with quote

Shocked I am not sure I got all your story. When I couldn't figure out what you meant, I changed the sentences.

Anonymous wrote:

La nuit précédant l'interrogation

Étudiant: Zut, J’ai oublié mon manuel (ou livre) et il y a une interrogation demain


Le lendemain

Étudiant: Il est temps. Je suis prêt

Parent: Quelle heure est-il?

Étudiant: Il est cinq heures. J’ai lu le roman.

Parent: Pourquoi t'es-tu réveillé si tôt?

Étudiant: J’ai étudié parce qu'il y a une interrogation demain (aujourd'hui?)

Parent: Qu'est-ce que tu as fait si tard hier soir?

Étudiant: J'ai cherché le manuel (ou livre) qui a disparu

Parent: J'allais t'emmener à l'école

Étudiant: non, merci

Étudiant: J'ai cherché mon handkerchief (???) mais je ne l'ai pas trouvé
Parent: Au fait, j'ai trouvé ton mouchoir

Dans L’ecole

Étudiant: J’espois c’est venu travail.. (??? it makes no sense please say in English what you want to say)

Narrateur: Il glissa la carte a couverture au mouchoir (??? it makes no sense please say in English what you want to say)


Dans la classe

Étudiant : Excellent, mon idée est un succès. J’ai toujours su que j’étais tres intelligent.

Étudiant : Où est-ce que je vais pouvoir trouver le livre?

Narrator : Il chercha dans le classe pendant dix minutes et finalement il découvrit un livre dans le bureau du professeur. Il prit le livre rapidement et il sortit de le classe.

Étudiant : J’ai pensé, j’ai venu dans l’école parce que, il y a seulement un heure jusqu'à ma première classe à commencé et je ne suis pas retard. (??? it makes no sense please say in English what you want to say)

thanks
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Guest






PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 10:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

For the first one...

Quote:
Étudiant: J’espois c’est venu travail..


I was trying to say I hope this will work ( this is when he is trying to slide the card covered in the handkerchief down the side of the door)


I think i will walk around the school because there is only an hour left because my class starts in hour and i don't want to be late.

Quote:
Narrateur: Il glissa la carte a couverture au mouchoir


he used a card coverd with his handkerchief to open the door

Quote:
Étudiant : J’ai pensé, j’ai venu dans l’école parce que, il y a seulement un heure jusqu'à ma première classe à commencé et je ne suis pas retard.


I think i will walk around the school because there is only an hour left because my class starts in hour and i don't want to be late.
[/quote]
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Julien



Joined: 10 Feb 2005
Posts: 388
Location: Germany / France

PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 10:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

That's a weird story Laughing Anyways:
Can you really open a door with a tissue and a credit card?

Anonymous wrote:
I hope this will work


J'espère que ça va marcher

Quote:
Narrateur: Il glissa la carte a couverture au mouchoir


Il glissa la carte recouverte du mouchoir

Quote:
he used a card coverd with his handkerchief to open the door


Il utilisa la carte recouverte du mouchoir pour ouvrir la porte

Quote:
I think i will walk around the school because there is only an hour left because my class starts in hour and i don't want to be late.


Je pense que je vais aller faire un tour car il ne reste qu'une heure avant que le cours commence et je ne veux pas être en retard
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Guest






PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you so much for your help. Do you have any other suggestions for opportunities in the story to use passe compose.
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Guest






PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Instead of

Quote:
Le lendemain


can I use

Quote:
Le prochain jour
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Julien



Joined: 10 Feb 2005
Posts: 388
Location: Germany / France

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 9:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Anonymous wrote:
Instead of

Quote:
Le lendemain


can I use

Quote:
Le prochain jour


No but le jour suivant is alright
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Julien



Joined: 10 Feb 2005
Posts: 388
Location: Germany / France

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 9:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Anonymous wrote:
Thank you so much for your help. Do you have any other suggestions for opportunities in the story to use passe compose.


When you tell a story, you use passé simple, not passé composé
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Guest






PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 4:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

But my teacher wants me to use passe compose.
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Julien



Joined: 10 Feb 2005
Posts: 388
Location: Germany / France

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 4:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Only the narrator part should be in passé simple. That's unavoidable and your teacher won't blame you for that.
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Guest






PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 4:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks agian
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Meg



Joined: 10 Mar 2005
Posts: 54
Location: United States

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 5:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

what is passe simple?
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Julien



Joined: 10 Feb 2005
Posts: 388
Location: Germany / France

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 5:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Meg wrote:
what is passe simple?


A tense that you won't use very often.
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zmike



Joined: 11 Mar 2005
Posts: 220
Location: Canada

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 6:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So how do u use it?
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